Sunday, October 18, 2015

The hard times

It's so easy to go on and on, on social media about all the wonderful good things going on in your life. The wonderful news about our number 2 joining our family. Madeline growing, growing and growing. School projects, new job promotions, or just typical everyday I love my life posts.

How amazing it is that we can celebrate the amazing things going on in our lives. But what about those really hard times? What about those nights where you stay up crying because somethings just isn't right in your life and there isn't any cause for celebration.

 How many posts I've seen on instagram of people suffering. Silently. No one knows the struggles they are going through. And all you can do is, is just look at the picture and think to yourself about how sad you are for them. A lot of times I feel though that we don't share because we feel that other people are thinking to themselves "Oh, I feel so sorry for them, Glad it's not me though! HA!" Which is so not true. But that's what I think to myself.

While life right now, has had some amazing news and we are happy. We are having some hard times. Last night at 12:30 Madeline wouldn't go to bed. And I was so tired and emotionally. But I just thought to myself, "I hate my life." I literally sat there and cried my eyes out while my daughter looked at me in confusion. And I was so much more ashamed because I was being selfish and thinking I hate my life. And eventually she curled up to me and went to bed.

I woke up this morning and decided something needed to change. It's Sunday and while we should've been at church, I couldn't muster up the courage to get myself to church. So instead I stayed home and scrubbed my house. I needed to change my environment first. I made dinner, we sat down at the dinner table as a family since we never can anymore. We enjoyed our dinner and loved our time together. After dinner we decided to do family home evening.

And then played as a family and put technology away until Madeline went to bed an hour ago.

It was amazing. And tonight instead of crying, I'll be going to bed with a smile on face saying "I love my life" and wouldn't want to change anything. It's all about perspective. We all have hard times. We all have days where we think we hate our lives. But there are better days ahead. Its just a bad day. Not a bad life. And that's what I tell myself! Take one day at a time, and you'll make it I promise!

1 comment:

  1. Love this Courtney! Thanks for sharing! I feel like it is always a good thing to take time for yourself when you need it, so that you can feel more in control and just happier!


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