Monday, December 23, 2013

Things you should NEVER say to a pregnant woman

I am putting this up to warn those out there who have never been pregnant, who don't have any tact, or for those that are just plain rude and don't even know.

Things that you should never say to pregnant women:

-We understand that we eat a lot, we are growing another human being. And finding food that makes it so we don't want to vomit is rare. So when we do find something we want to eat, we pretty much inhale that stuff. You commenting on how much we eat, that are we sure were not eating for two?,  that we need to slow down, or ANYTHING that deals with us eating, is a BIG NO NO! Don't do it. Because you'll make her either 1. self conscious 2. you'll get slapped 3. she'll burst out into tears later. so PLEASE keep your rude comments to yourself. And even if you aren't meaning to be rude, just don't.

-Pregnant women also understand that when you get pregnant your stomach just naturally gets bigger. It has to, to accommodate a growing baby. Some women LOVE their pregnant bellies. Others like myself who has a hard time seeing myself this big, are already self conscious so you making snide comments about how much weight we've gained, or are we sure there aren't twins in there? or anything to talk about how "huge" we look is another BIG NO NO! Don't do it. Keep your comments to yourself. It doesn't matter if she looks like a whale. Your not the one who's body is accommodating a baby so YOU don't get to comment.

-As a woman approaches the big D day, aka her due date, she is getting excited. She has done TONS of careful research. She has talked to her doctor and close trusted family members and friends about what to expect during labor and delivery. She is already nervous if this is her first time since obviously she's never experienced it. But since she did her careful research she feels ready and confident. But you talking about "how awful" your labor was. Or about how you were in active labor for 56 hours with no pain medication and blah blah blah. It is NOT helpful. WE DON'T WANT TO KNOW. I'm sorry to say this but unless a pregnant woman specifically asks you about your labor experience, or stories you know, don't tell her. She doesn't want to know your "horror stories" Labor and delivery is scary for first time mom's. So PLEASE we know you are just dying to tell your tale about how you rocked labor, but please keep it to yourself until 1. she asks you specifically or 2. she's already gone through labor and delivery herself.

- Again as the woman approaches her due date and finally hits the "full term" mark she is of course getting excited. It means the baby can come at any point. It might not come for a few more weeks but really it could come at any time. No pregnant women wants to be pregnant longer than she has to be. So when she goes into false labor and thinks that she's in labor and told "no" by the doctor or whoever she starts to get depressed. So you commenting "oh it's not so bad, my babies came 1 week late, 2 weeks late, 1 month late! You shouldn't complain!" THOSE ARE NOT HELPFUL COMMENTS! I'm sure when you hit the full term mark  you were just as excited and every day your baby wasn't here you got more and more depressed. We are sorry your babies were overdue. But let me just point out.... YOUR BABIES ARE ALREADY HERE! Unless you are overdue right this second YOU HAVE NO RIGHT to tell her she can't complain. She's freaking 9 months pregnant. And telling her oh you still could go for another month, really will make her 1. want to kill you 2. make her punch you 3. when her baby finally gets here make you wait those extra week, 2 weeks, month to hold the baby since you were dying to make her MORE depressed. Don't say it, don't even think about telling her not to complain about being pregnant. She wants her baby here and making her realize she could be pregnant for another month... that's just CRUEL!

-I have to put this one on here. When you see a pregnant woman and your first instinct is to go up and rub her stomach, DON'T. You must first ask permission. If she has already given permission to you then you are fine to rub her tummy. Otherwise, HANDS OFF. I personally don't feel comfortable with people rubbing my stomach, there are only a select few who I am okay with touching my belly. So unless I've told you who you are. DON'T DO IT.

-And last but not least, (sorry Jace this one is for you) Don't try to tell a pregnant woman about pregnancy, labor and delivery, or other things when you have never experienced it, clearly have not done as much research as them, or have spoken to a health care professional. I can't even tell you how much research I've done during this pregnancy to know what to expect. And having some male teenager know it all come and tell ME that I'M WRONG about things... NO. You just quietly nod your head, maybe take a few notes, and move on with the conversation. Don't try to be "smarter" than them. Because your wrong. Just know you are wrong, and accept it. Because why argue with a pregnant woman ever? and chances are you could get slapped or make her cry. Both of which are very very BAD FOR YOU! So just don't do it! 

Anyways those are some things I've encountered lately that I just HATE. So take my advice so you don't get killed by the next pregnant woman you see! And really I put this on here because all of this happened to me and I really don't like it. So if you do one of the above things I'll either ignore you, hate you, kill you, not let you see my baby, or cry. So please give let us have some cheer this holiday season by you not acting like a dim wit! Thanks!! :D 

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