Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Advice

I was online today trying to get some advice because Zack and I seem to be fighting about everything constantly. It's like this never ending thing. Everything is fine until we get in the car together and then we do nothing but fight. I have just been going out of my mind.

I think the problem is we are both SO stubborn that neither one of us will give up. Like last night, Zack said he was going to sleep on the couch because we were fighting about something stupid of course. But see he hates sleeping on the couch and I knew he didn't want to. So I asked him if he was really going to sleep out there. He didn't respond and he slept out there all night. I woke him up in the morning and asked him why he slept out there and it was because I didn't say the right thing.... I was like I'm your wife not a mind reader. Okay I really didn't way that but honestly to have a crappy night sleep just so that way I'll ask him if he's coming to bed.... Goodness!! 

So I decided to do the logical thing. Get on the internet and get advice. I found this really good one. Viewer discretion advised. I am copying and pasting what I found and one of them is a bit detailed. But this is for all married couples (newlyweds) that seem to be going as crazy and desperate like me! And then I found a funny one so I will put it at the bottom. You can read it take what you want from it or just ignore it. But I'm mainly writing to those newlyweds that just can't figure out what happened after the honeymoon ended.

Mistake #1: Not Dealing With Debt

Newsflash: Money is the #1 thing couples fight about. Fess up about your personal debt -- because for better or worse -- and then set up a financial game plan with our budgeter.

Mistake #2: Alienating Your Friends

Friends are key for a successful marriage, so tag along on those girls' nights out. Just because you're not guy-hunting doesn't mean you can't be a supportive wingwoman.

Mistake #3: Not Having Enough Sex

Over 60 percent of newlyweds we surveyed were already in a sex rut! Yeah, you're busy, but that's not a good enough excuse not to get busy. Initiate sex, even if you don't feel like it or have to schedule it. If you get in the habit of having it, you'll start wanting it (and liking it) more.

Mistake #4: Letting Yourself Go

So you put on the "newlywed nine." Big whoop...you've already found your mate, right? Wrong! Make a plan to get fit together or at least respect each other's goals.

Mistake #5: Outlawing the In-Laws

Fifty percent of couples we surveyed have a problematic relationship with their in-laws (ya think?). Manage expectations, like saying you'll call on Sundays so his mom doesn't guilt-trip you for ignoring her weekday messages. Even if your spouse is bitching about his family, resist the urge to chime in. It'll bite you in the butt later.

Mistake #6: Crazy Fighting

Getting hitched isn't a free pass to hit below the belt (sorry!). When you're getting really heated, walk away to cool down for a few minutes.

Mistake #7: Becoming Baby-Obsessed

It's easy to fixate on that next big step, but chill out -- the average couple has a kid within three years of marriage. So really, why rush? Savor the moments (and vacations you can take!) now...when you won't have to be waking up for a brutal 4 a.m. feeding.

There is no question that men and women see life very differently. Here is some funny (but on target) advice for the new husband.

Leave Past Mistakes Behind You

When a man gets married, he should leave the past behind him, and forget all of his poor choices. After all, there is no use in two people remembering the same things.

Arguments

If a husband finds himself in the midst of an argument with his beloved, he should remember one thing. His wife is right.

Scary Questions

The question that will most rapidly drive fear into the heart of any many is, “Honey, do I look fat in this?” If you are approached with this question, falling to the floor in a mock coma is recommended.

Kitchen Advice

Women love men who cook but they can't resist a man who does the dishes.

Things Never to Say to Your Wife

  • Have you put on weight?
  • My mom didn't make it like this.
  • I taped the Redskins game over the wedding DVD.
  • That's really not your color is it?
  • Have you ever thought about plastic surgery?
  • I bought you a cookbook.
  • I bought you a hammer.
  • I thought you needed this. (Note, unless “this” is a piece of expensive jewelry then you are asking for trouble.)
  • I had lunch with my old girlfriend today.
  • Anniversary? What anniversary?
  • Birthday? What birthday?
  • Why can't your mom stay at a hotel?
  • So, what did you do all day?
  • Hi honey, look whom I brought home!
  • I married you, didn't I?
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Remember...

Chunky is a candy bar. Never use it as a reference to your wife.

The wedding day is usually a high stress time for everyone. Having some funny advice for newlyweds may keep bridezilla at bay. Just be sure to be sensitive to the stress level so your funny advice doesn't get you kicked out of the wedding party.

Things Never to Ask Your Husband

  • Do you think I look fat in this?
  • Would you rather watch football or go shopping with me?
  • Do you think the new neighbor is pretty?
  • What do you think of my new recipe for 'insert name of exotic gourmet dish here'?
  • You don't mind if I take that new position across the country, do you?
  • Aren't you going to stop and ask for directions?
  • Are you sure you can do that?
  • Is that a bald spot?
  • Do you love me?

Arguments

The best way to win an argument with your husband is to begin removing clothing.

Kitchen Advice

Men usually want either food or sex. Learn to cook and keep your pantry stocked if you want to get anything done.

Money Advice

Don't bother fighting about money. There is usually not enough of it to go around anyway.

Seasons

There is a season for everything. Now that you're married the seasons are:
  • Hockey
  • Baseball
  • Basketball
  • Football
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Don't Bring Up His Past Mistakes

He will make plenty of new ones you can use against him.


Hope that helps! It sure helped me! Good luck! 

1 comment:

  1. A few things that have helped us the most: scripture study together, fhe, and prayers. Having a strict budget (each person has a set allowance every month they can spend on whatever, everything else is for bills and savings) never talking bad about the other person, and doing activities everyday that we love. Usually we go rock climbing, the gym, take walks (and hold hands!!!) and we cuddle everyday. But we don't spend a ton of money on dates. Let each other know you really appreciate them. And kiss and say "I love you" everyday. Thats huge and keeps things positive. Oh, I could go on and on. So much stuff helps. No marriage is perfect but you live and learn pretty fast :)

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